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There's one thing you should try if you can, and it won't cost you a dime. Find another boxster owner in your local PCA chapter, get to know them, let them get to know you, and ask them to help you isolate your issue by loaning you their front rims/tires for a half hour on a Saturday.
You may just find that it's your rims or tires. This was the issue with my car. I swapped rims and tires and voila! No high speed steering wheel shake.
The other thing you have not mentioned is wheel bearings. This might just be an issue considering you're driving on 10 year old bearings. Even though they may have no back and forth (side to side) play in them, they may be the culprit.
Changing out the tie rod ends will be cheaper than wheel bearings because the labor is far less involved. Not a bad move if swapping rims/tires with someone doesn't remedy the problem.
I really understand your frustration. This kind of crap is really difficult to live with. It made me want to sell my car at a loss and walk away.
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