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Old 12-23-2012, 06:01 PM   #1
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How to tell my wife that I purchased a Boxster...

Well it all started on November 21st when I received an email alert that a Blue/Tan Boxster was for sale near me and within the mileage and price range I had specified many months earlier. I drove down to see it and left a small deposit. A week later I decided to proceed and on December 4th I picked it up. I drove it home and put it in the storage facility until April 1st. Three times I had tried to take her to lunch or do something while the kids were in school to break the news to her and show it, but something always came up, dentist appointments, company lunch party etc. I had to leave for business on the 14th and just got home yesterday. So she still has no idea...

She is leaving on a trip to Japan with my daughter on Christmas day and not returning until January 4th. Just in case she is pissed, I do not want to impact Christmas day or her trip...maybe I should wait, but I hate this suspense.

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Old 12-23-2012, 06:05 PM   #2
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The sooner you tell her, the better!
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Old 12-23-2012, 06:06 PM   #3
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Dear god, I just did the same thing.

I got a chance to get a really nice blue on grey Boxster, and I did not speak to my wife first. I knew if I did, she'd get angry and cut my dreams short.

So, I just got it. I parked it down the street for a few nights and snuck out to drive it when no one would see.

Finally, I found the right time to tell her. I just came out and told her, and tried to explain it as best I could.

She surprisingly was not too mad, she was more upset she did not enjoy getting it with me, and that it's a manual.
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Old 12-23-2012, 06:27 PM   #4
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You guys are certainly brave..

Why don't you try this technique..
Jeff Who Lives At Home clip: We Got The Porsche - YouTube
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Old 12-23-2012, 06:31 PM   #5
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You guys must have good lawyers! LOL
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Old 12-23-2012, 06:51 PM   #6
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What do you care? Obviously the car is more important to you than your partnership with your wife.
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Old 12-23-2012, 06:56 PM   #7
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Dear god, I just did the same thing.

Gee, I thought I was the only one. I knew she'd say no to a Harley, so I bought one anyway and didn't tell her until I needed a ride to the airport to fly out and pick it up. Needless to say I had to have a friend drive me to the airport. That was in '07 and there's still hell to pay. For the Boxster, I knew she'd say no too, but this time I told her before I pulled the trigger. That was in 2010 and she still hates the car.
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:17 PM   #8
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Back in '07, We were on our way grocery shopping with the kids and I drove right past the exit, a moment later she realized that we had gone past it and mentioned that I had missed the exit. I told her I had to go somewhere, she asked where and I told her that I had to pick up my 2005 CVO V-Rod from Cape Cod Harley Davidson. Surprisingly, she was like.."your kidding!" We got there and she followed me home. This became the theme of my father's day and birthday gifts. She has bought me many tee shirts.

A year later she came home from work and I had a 2001 black Road King sitting right next to the V-Rod. That was no problem. But it was taking up the entire garage, so a couple of months later I was on a business road trip for a couple of weeks and returned home with a trailer to house both bikes.

Last year I sold the V-Rod and the trailer as I always seemed to prefer riding the Road King.

At that time, she told me I should sell the Road King and buy a Porsche. So she does recognize that if your going to buy a sports car, make it a real sports car!
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:19 PM   #9
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Is she bigger than you ?
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:22 PM   #10
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Do what I did when I bought a TR4a a few years ago. I parked it in the garage and when my wife came home she said "is that a new car in the garage?" I said "of course not, we have had that one for three or four months." She said "OK" and that was the last I heard of it. The next day I told her about just getting the car and how my daughter and I had a good laugh when she fell for my line. Luckily my wife understands my love of cars and never gets upset when I bring home a new one.
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:23 PM   #11
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Is she bigger than you ?
No, but that picture got me a little excited as I tried to imagine how to handle a woman that size. I guess she defined the term "Boy Toy"
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:28 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by MikenOH View Post
You guys are certainly brave..

Why don't you try this technique..
Jeff Who Lives At Home clip: We Got The Porsche - YouTube
Good idea but don't do this the next day Jeff Who Lives At Home - Porsche Crash - Clip - YouTube
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:32 PM   #13
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Not saying I would ever actually do this but...
"So honey, this car came up for sale and I went to take a look at it (shows pic). It in great shape and a fair price. I went over our finances and we are in pretty good shape right now. I think I want to buy it. What do you think?"

1. She says "Looks nice honey, why don't you get it." Crisis over.
2. She says "No f***ing way you are bring that home. We are 3 months behind on the light bill" Put it up for adoption fast.

Although the timing of events might be a little ummm, out of sequence, you did technically include her in the decision process. They NEED to be included. To just spring it on her is a Lorena Bobbit offense.
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:42 PM   #14
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Danger, where in the hell do you find all those messed up photos? Too funny, I am still rolling. I don't know how long you guys have been married but I have to hand it to you for your bravery. When I found the Boxster I had been looking for, I told my wife about it and she just said you better grab it or you will regret it later. We have been married for 27 years and she has always been supportive except for the surprise Kawasaki Mean Streak I brought home one day. She never did get on that thing but she loves riding in the Boxster. Best thing about that is she can't drive a manual so it's all mine! Good luck guys and I hope you have a Merry Christmas.
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Old 12-23-2012, 07:59 PM   #15
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Do what I did when I bought a TR4a a few years ago. I parked it in the garage and when my wife came home she said "is that a new car in the garage?" I said "of course not, we have had that one for three or four months." She said "OK" and that was the last I heard of it. The next day I told her about just getting the car and how my daughter and I had a good laugh when she fell for my line. Luckily my wife understands my love of cars and never gets upset when I bring home a new one.
Yeah, I think that is great and I expect that I am going to share the same experience. My wife also knows that I love sports cars and Harley's. When she met me, I had an absolutely mint Triumph TR-6 that I rebuilt from the ground up. I sold it a couple of years later because we were trying to buy a house, start a family etc.

This purchase was the last big toy that I have wanted for quite some time. She even purchased the May 2012 copy of Automobile Magazine for me while we were at the beach in Maine back in June. It has been in our bathroom stack of reading since. See HERE

So when she wanted a Jeep Wrangler this past summer, she got it! I then sunk about $2k into it and made it much nicer. We had an '06 Honda Odyssey approaching 100k miles and it need about $2000 worth of maintenance. She wanted a new 2012 Touring model she got it. I gave her the garage in order to keep her new Honda in mint condition. I rented a garage bay to keep my bike and seasonal stuff in. I do not squawk when I see a new Coach or Louis Vuitton handbags in the closet. Woman find solace in having many bags, shoes, jewelry, etc. I like jeans, tee shirts, bikes and now my Boxster.

Heck all my clothes, bike, Boxster, computers, TV etc. costs about half of what her Odyssey costs. So in my house it is not all about me. I just made another impulse purchase and the timing was not right with our busy schedules.
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Last edited by V-Rod; 12-23-2012 at 08:07 PM.
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Old 12-23-2012, 08:41 PM   #16
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I think you send her an email when she's in Japan. Tell her you got her a surprise Christmas present and she has to wait till she's home to see it. Hopefully she has a good sense of humor and realizes that it is for the both of you and the both of you will have lots of fun with it.
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Old 12-23-2012, 09:39 PM   #17
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Ok, the short story version goes like this... When I met my wife I was without a motorcycle and missing it a lot. My wife helped me find a mint Kawasaki Concours with 1500 miles on it. Only paid about $2000 for it. Amazing deal. Later I sold it and bought a 1996 BMW R1200RT then bought a K1200RT so we could ride together. That lasted two rides. Finances were getting tight so I sold it. A few months later I sold the RT too. I was bummed. The next year I bought $600 in lottery tickets and won a R1200GS and upgraded it for $2500 to a 2009 R1200RT. I was in heaven. When my wife lost here job I sold it and downsized to a 2005 R1200RS. When my car engine had a meltdown I sold the bike to fix my car. A year l was getting frustrated and needed something to help relieve the tension. I was thinking a motorcycle and my wife was ok with that but bummed she could not participate with it. I suggested lessons and her own motorcycle.

While heading down that path, my wife suggested buying a roadster like a miata, z3, or z4. We actually test drove the z4, but with the electronic steering assist and steptronic transmission it didn't feel right to me and it smelled of the previous owners dog. My wife could not stay in the car. On our way through the showroom she saw a Porsche boxster in violet blue metallic. The words "my favorite color" & "awesome" bubbled out of her along with her bouncing around it joyfully. So we test drove it. I liked it, she loved it, so we bought it. Her favorite color, but my daily driver and "project car". I like a vehicle I can work on and the boxster is an easy car to work on.

Moral is ... If your wife loves you and you love her then there is no problems. Compromise may be needed at times, but if there is love there is understanding and no need to hide the things you buy to help you cope with the world or make life more enjoyable.

Just remember the car seats two. Tell her you bought it as a means of sharing special moments and sights together. Take her on a weekend ride occasionally with the top down. Enjoy it. Together.

Last edited by AKnowles; 12-23-2012 at 10:29 PM.
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Old 12-23-2012, 10:25 PM   #18
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Reason #37 that I never re-married: no wifely repurcussions for having an unexpected winning bid on e-bay.

However, if I were married, unless money is no concern at all, there would have been numerous discussions about this as a possible purchase, probably including practicality, affordability, logistics of parking and dialogue about vehicles in the family in general.

Major Warning For All: I'm about to unload heavy on VRod over this.

But you didn't do that, and you've hidden the purchase so far, which tells me you think she'll be angry about it. Yeah, it's a Boxster, but that's both stupid and selfish. Everything else about what you did for her vehicles is rationalizing your decision to do this without her knowing.

Man up and tell her everything without "I did this for you " or "I paid that for your car". If she's pissed, it's not because you bought it but because you didn't discuss it beforehand. You're a complete ass-hat for not doing that.

IMHO, I can't believe somebody that stupid makes enough money to buy any Boxster or be married long enough for this to be a problem.

Seriously, dude, marriage is supposed to be a partnership, and you ran rogue, then blamed it on her. FAIL.

If you can't share this with her ASAP, you aren't meant to be married to her. I'm already in the camp of "you are an iditot", but if she can't accept what you did, I'll also join the camp of "neither one of you deserves the other."

And if your wife understands and accepts, it would be reason # 37 why I should be re-married.

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Old 12-24-2012, 03:36 AM   #19
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Thought I might have a potential problem back when I was married to her and I bought an Alfa GTV coupe.I bought a red Alfa Spider Veloce for her and all was well! Both were manual transmission and she was good with that.
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Old 12-24-2012, 05:10 AM   #20
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But definitely tell her. I only waited a couple of days while I found the right time to say it, and it turned out ok.

The relationship is more important, but we men are stupid. (That's what they tell us anyway, it may be true)

I told her - at least it's only a secret car, and not a secret girlfriend!

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