Damn rotisserie chicken

[CJ_Boxster]

Originally Posted by Rail26

So I am home alone...long day of defending freedom and I decide hey, I want some Kenny Rogers chicken. Well, we know Kenny doesn't exist anymore so I ended up settling for a rotary chick from the grocery store. I ended up eating the whole thing...and wham. Two o'clock in the morning I am a rancid chicken sprayin' sprinkler (the cats loved it by the way). I puke my guts out while laying on the cold bathroom tile all night long. I get up this morning to check out the date on the chicken...two days old. WTF? I called the store and told them and they told me to bring it in. I said I couldn't even stand up...how about you bring me some Ginger Ale or something. Anyway, I am still puking and I keep hearing this voice say "Carol Ann, step away from the light." If you end up seeing the Box on ebay...help out my widow and give it a good price.

Fear not, Ill take care of your wife for you, Hey is there room in your house for a persian cat and my 53 inch tv?

You know, before i even clicked on this post, i knew it was writen by Rail26...i just finished reading one of his last posts, and then saw rotisserie chicken, and just knew it was him.

lol

too bad about the chicken, next time try cat. i have this one that sits outside my house everyday waiting for me to come home for the past 5 days...who's god dam cat. my dad's about to drive the cat to another neighbourghhood and leave it there. seeyou cat.

[SD987]

As someone who "eats out" 365 days a year I confess that I too have consumed a Grocery Store Deli Rotisserie chicken.

Some observations:

They are generally on the small side and a whole one can be consumed by an amateur with less than Kobayashi-like skills. I think at the chicken farm they take all the small runt-sized ones and mark them for shipment to places like KFC and the grocery deli as they are definitely Grade B birds.

I don't routinely check the expiration date as I assume they're all cooked the "day of" and am horrified to hear they are not. I'll start checking henceforth.

However, I will say that the Rot-chickens are far too accessible to tampering. I've resisted the urge to lift the plastic lid and poke one for "moistness" on more than one occasion. Someone with an agenda (pretty clearly an Al Quaeda operative, in this case) could easily contaminate the chicken with Anthrax or similar. I think salmonella is more likely in the case of your chicken than e. coli. Salmonellae are frequent caught from poultry and raw eggs and more generally from food that has been cooked or frozen, and not eaten straight away. Plus, if someone tried to take an e.coli crap on a Rot-chicken, I like to think a keen-eyed store employee or the consumer would notice.

Don't be afraid to walk into the light, your wife can still communicate with you through your television set, or CJ_Boxster's set, as the case may be.

[CJ_Boxster]

Originally Posted by SD987

your wife can still communicate with you through your television set, or CJ_Boxster's set, as the case may be.

My TV set will do fine, it has Picture in Picture so i dont mind if he talks to his wife through the smaller picture in the corner while i watch the Speed Channel... They can use the bigger picture on "Two-Wheeled Tuesdays" on Speed, no one watches that program anyways.

[pecivil]

never, never I repeat NEVER eat market deli cooked chicken!!

I guess you already know why by now....

go to KFC iffin you have a hankerin for Chicken

[Rail26]

Wow, the pouring of support has been...inspiring. With offers to take care of my wife and communicate through TVs...you guys are the best. I just woke up and still not feeling like a million bucks...more like $1.95 found in the washer.

Those chickens are so tempting though...so moist and juicy and they smell so good. Never again my Porschefiles....never again. Uh oh, I'm starting to get that rumblin' down under....oh billy.

[unklekraker]

aye, rail...i was about to leave you a get well soon and fast recovery comment but i got caught up contemplating on our new Porschefiles prayer by jeff
of course, if anything serious happen, we are all here for you but I call first dibs on your avatar..hehehehehe! oh yah, if you need bigger tv to commmunicate with us, mine got 4 Picture in Picture screen and 65"...oh no' did i start a "who's got a bigger tv set" thread ......