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Originally Posted by denverpete
6) We know that many will envy your vehicle and probably want to steal it. For an extra charge we offer a security package which will notify you with a cheerful beep anytime you leave your console box unlocked. An interior sensor picks up anyone inside the car provided the top is down and they're sitting on the dashboard. None of this should be construed to imply that this security system will activate due to broken windows, accidents while your vehicle is parked, or if it's being towed. However, you should feel confident knowing it's protecting your investment. Maybe.
7) Please inspect all safety features on a regular basis. A helpful airbag warning light will come on periodically to remind you to replace your seat belt harness.
8) We at Porsche believe that racing should be done only on the track (or with the 911 series). To this end we've limited the horsepower of your vehicle so that you can appreciate the serenity of your surroundings as well as the tail lights of such famous sports cars as the Honda Accord V6 and Subaru Outback.
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That's some good stuff. I think I wet myself laughing...
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