If the Boxster was a....

[BIGJake111]

Originally Posted by thstone

Ted Cruz would be an air-cooled 911 - A purist true to the original cause.

Jeb would be a 991, Dubya would be a 997, and George H. would be a 996 - After each change, everyone would wonder if the lineage is getting better or worse.

Marco Rubio would be a Cayman - Well balanced but always underpowered.

Rand Paul would be a Cayenne - It was a novel idea..... fifteen years ago.

John Kasich would be a Macan - You know, the sensible, boring one that your mom would choose.

Trump would be a 930 Turbo - Sounds great, but ready to go out of control at any moment.

Chris Christy would be a Panamera - Bloated with a big ass.

Ben Carson would be a Mission E - Still needs four more years of development.

And... wait for it .... Carly Fiorina would be a Boxster - its a chick car!


Disclaimer: Its just forum humor. This was all in fun. Please no death threats. We can make fun of Democrats next. No cats were threatened or harmed in the writing of this post.

Disclaimer #2: Clearly, I have way too much f'ing time on my hands this evening.

Hrmm here is my run down of the GOP.

Cruz- 924, old school, runs pretty good, but I wouldn't trust it to bring my kid home safe.

Jeb- panamera v6, doesn't have the power of the other Porsche's. Kinda boring beyond the badge.

Rubio-991, good car, but a bigger reliance on technology and more expensive then it should be. Comfortable and welcoming though.

Carson- slant nose 911, people like it because it's air cooled, however air cooled cars are outdated, but it's kinda outside of the system and hard to know if you can trust it.

Trump- an Arabian modified Carrara GT. Loud and offensive. More power then necessary. Could never win the support of those who don't like sports cars.

Kasich- 968, cool car, good car. Not the prettiest. Will be mostly forgotten.

Christy- Porsche replica, looks like a Porsche until you get close and realize it's not.

Carly- 996 gt2 unpredictable, when you get to know it, it can have more ego than the carrera gt even.

Huckabee- vw bettle. You get one thing. Don't expect to hear about anything other then basic transportation (or religion) from it.

Rand Paul- 986 boxster, engine isn't in the front or back, holds a different philosophy all together. Everything you need and nothing you don't, good value, no excess power but good handling, no excess flash or technology. Still has a manual transmission and no traction control, thinks you should drive the car yourself. Harkens back to the 550 spyder and the most basic DNA of Porsche whilst looking forward as well.

People shy away though as its low Horsepower, not as eye catching. And they're scared to death the IMS will go out.

[Perfectlap]

Cruz would be a Pinto. Looks like nothing before but basically lethal for all when they climb aboard (and actually made in Canada).

Fiorina would be a Tesla: Looks fancy but nothing under the hood...
except she would outsource her self and kill off profit-sharing program for everyone

Doctor Carson would be an old FIAT, sounds great but unreliable under pressure.
or maybe a Prius... goes into sleep mode while moving.

Huckabee would be an El Camino. Looks like its all work but who knows what's really going on in the back...

Rand is a import tuner Honda Civic with big coffee can exhaust: makes a lot of racket in the neighborhood but goes nowhere fast.

Kasich is a Chevy Cruz: Too basic and normal to ever be too popular in the GOP.

Christie is a Suburban XL... does not have to be that big. Zero mileage but still running.

Trump.... would be a DeLorean... amusing shiny thing but soon to be bankrupt.

Hillary would be some other rolling death trap... but GM built of course and DME comes back erased every time.

Best solution: avoid all of the above and ride your bicycle whenever possible.

Best quote: "Toute nation a le gouvernement qu’elle mérite" translation: we elect the clowns we deserve.

Jake, I once worked on Presidential campaigns and met more politicians than I care to admit. Politics is a giant manipulation of the people pushed by for-profit news media networks (ALL OF THEM) who report nothing but half-truths (the half that their particular viewership want to hear) designed to inflame and excite and political parties. These parties, all of them, exist only to make politicians rich or inflate their egos while luring in those who are more emotional than informed. My first day of college I was taught by a future Governor who basically said to me something along the lines of "governance is doing the will of the people with a MINIMUM of politics. Politics is doing as little governance as possible with maximum polarization."

Cars on the other hand actually have to get something done, make forward progress.