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I found the solution!
Show the problem you're having to a co-worker who can help you out. As it turns out, the co-worker doesn't have to do anything other than look at you like you've got 3 heads as you thoroughly describe the problem only to demonstrate the trouble and the key just turns and moves to the unlock position just as it should.
That takes care of the issue right away.
Just for reference (not that it matters anymore) the button would push, and the key went in and out, but the key would not turn. The car just wanted to make me look silly is all. Some sort of German joke.
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2003 Porsche 986 Boxster S, Black / Tan
RIP: 1998 Porsche 986, Arena Red / Savanna Beige (wrecked)
1990 Pontiac Trans Am GTA .:. 1990 Corvette ZR-1 (#1930) .:. 1992 Pontiac Firehawk (#010)
1931 Ford Model A Tudor .:. 1967 Pontiac GTO .:. 1986 Pontiac Trans Am basket-case
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