Damn rotisserie chicken

[Rail26]

So I am home alone...long day of defending freedom and I decide hey, I want some Kenny Rogers chicken. Well, we know Kenny doesn't exist anymore so I ended up settling for a rotary chick from the grocery store. I ended up eating the whole thing...and wham. Two o'clock in the morning I am a rancid chicken sprayin' sprinkler (the cats loved it by the way). I puke my guts out while laying on the cold bathroom tile all night long. I get up this morning to check out the date on the chicken...two days old. WTF? I called the store and told them and they told me to bring it in. I said I couldn't even stand up...how about you bring me some Ginger Ale or something. Anyway, I am still puking and I keep hearing this voice say "Carol Ann, step away from the light." If you end up seeing the Box on ebay...help out my widow and give it a good price.