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Came up with a couple more...
XX) It is a common practice for Porsches to be put to the test by exposing them to driving events. In order to reduce weight we have elected to not put the proper corrosion resistant coating on your lug bolts. It's unfortunate that it will make your $XX,XXX car look like dog dooky, but with a little elbow grease and $10 worth of paint from you local hardware store you can get them looking like new every year or so.
XX+1) Seeing that you are a Porsche owner now, it must indicate your love for sports cars. We all know how much sports car enthusiasts love to take care of their cars and we at Porsche feel the same. Like every other enthusiast, we prefer to hand wash our vehicles to maintain the luster of the finish. We prefer this so much that we require it. Never mind the wonderful, dedicated drivers that drive in the snow and get salt on the undercarriage. We are not sure how they can clean their undercarriage by hand, but if you do take it to an automatic car wash you run the risk of catastrophic engine failure by sucking water through the intake. And of course this will not be covered by the warranty because we told you not to...
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