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I had a similar issue where I screwed up the (female) end of the connector (coming from the stereo) with the wires pulled out and the piece itself beyond repair. Not sure if it's the same, but mine was a BMW part, #1378134. Can you see any part number on yours?
I'm pretty sure I found out that the connector (both ends) was no longer produced, but I could be wrong. I managed to find a used end with 4 or 5 inches of the wires attached on Ebay, that came from Latvia of all places, for 10 bucks or so.
Looking from the end, the cross section is round on one edge and squared off on the other, so there is only one orientation by which it connects. Does that sound like your set up? With that in mind I would be able to tell you the proper scheme on the wire color order, starting from either one edge or the other. What color are the wires coming from your stereo (source)? I'll check my car later today or tomorrow.
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