So you take the center cap off the wheel so you can see the hub and how the wheel fits there. You hoist the wheel and center one lug hole over the hole in the hub and you choose one of the topmost ones. You insert the first lug bolt and turn it a few times. You now center the other holes and insert their lug bolts and tighten a few turns by hand. You note the way the inside of the lug nuts will contact the wheel and act to center the bolt in the lug nut holes in the wheels as the bolts are tightened. Now you tighten the bolts a bit at a time in a pattern that skips around, not doing two consecutively but every third one (from memory). You tighten then by doing this a few turns at a time going around the rim. I actually hold the tire and rim in place with my thighs while I am tightening the bolts so I am bearing the weight and so they go in the center of the bolt holes in the wheel and I'm not depending on the bolt head to center the bolt in the hole. You tighten until the wheel doesn't wiggle and the bolts are centered and bearing the weight of the wheel and tire, then get out the torque wrench.
At what point in this sequence are you seeing a problem? I think people are having trouble seeing what you are seeing.
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