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Ok, I'll play the straight guy in this comedy routine...
I believe the OP is referring to the fact that the current replacement coolant tanks do not have a hole for the oil dipstick in the top plate, since the tank was continued on the next generation of cars but they did not have a dipstick. When you buy and install a coolant tank these days, you have to drill the hole yourself for the dipstick, or just be satisfied checking it electronically. Although it can be done in place, this drilling is best done before installation (ask me how I know).
Undoubtedly, the OP's car had its tank replaced by a PO who failed to open up the dipstick hole...
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