Blown AOS ?
 

Coming home from work last Friday my '02 2.7 5 spd blew a tremendous smoke cloud while under accelaration on an entrance ramp. Immediatly pulled over and shut it down although it was not running rough. I was about 15 miles from home and in a sketchy part of town. I let it sit for a few minutes then started it back up. Still smoked but not near as bad. Thought I could limp it home but in a few huindred yards the heavy smoke returned. I shut it down and coasted to a side street. Called the wife to pick me up and went back with the trailer to pull it home. I tried to start it so I could drive onto the trailer but it would not turn over. You could hear the starter engage but could not turn engine over. I suspected liquid lock and hoped for the best. I pulled the coils and plugs and a lot of oil came out of #5. I cranked the engine over and oil came out of cyl #1, #4 & #5. After a couple cranks it would not turn over and the electrical system seemed to go haywire. Clock reset to 12:00. Dash lights flickered....

The crank thing sounds like battery. Good chance it's AOS and not worse. Inspect the vent on top of the AOS for oil in or on it. No oil should be on top.