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-   -   Holy IMS Prevention ! (http://986forum.com/forums/performance-technical-chat/36770-holy-ims-prevention.html)

Johnny Danger 08-12-2012 04:02 PM

Holy IMS Prevention !
 
1 Attachment(s)
For those who can't afford an IMS replacement, or even the Guardian for that matter, behold it's the IMS Indulgence! For just $14.29 ($17.49 if you're a Pentecostal or Adventist), the good folks at this roadside chapel will rebuke the IMS Demon with all manner of prayer in the most apostolic of fashion . Get that IMS Devil behind you !




* The fee also requires a small act of contrition. Unsure of what that involves at this time.

san rensho 08-12-2012 05:51 PM

Here in Miami, we Cubans rely on Santeria, a combination of ancient African religions and Catholicism to invoke the Gods protection of our precious IMSB. Its a little more complicated and does involve the ritual sacrifice of a dove but, hey, its a small price to pay for our motors.

St. Michael Protection Ritual - YouTube

Johnny Danger 08-12-2012 05:59 PM

Gee, and I thought witnessing someone speaking in tongues was strange ! :)

san rensho 08-12-2012 06:23 PM

No stranger than the Catholic Church. If you are Catholic, you have to believe in ritual cannibalism, where the priest turns bread and wine into the actual body and blood of Christ which is then consumed by the communicant, its pretty messed up.

Johnny Danger 08-12-2012 06:57 PM

I'm a born again agnostic !!

nnewell 08-12-2012 07:41 PM

Hope this helps Johnny.......doesn't say what the speed limit is but I would keep
it under 60 MPH to be polite.

Fort Lauderdale church offers drive-thru prayers - Sun Sentinel

~ Nick

Johnny Danger 08-13-2012 04:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nnewell (Post 301395)
Hope this helps Johnny.......doesn't say what the speed limit is but I would keep
it under 60 MPH to be polite.

Fort Lauderdale church offers drive-thru prayers - Sun Sentinel

~ Nick

Can one "supersize" his or her redemption ?

recycledsixtie 08-13-2012 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnny Danger (Post 301419)
Can one "supersize" his or her redemption ?

Yes please - you need all the help u can get!

Bruce Wayne 08-13-2012 10:12 AM

it seems we're still in stone age times here in the UK..

IMS prevention is taken care of by appeasing the ancient gods by deflowering a virgin on the altar stone at stonehenge..

as san rensho says it's a small price to pay for our motors.

recycledsixtie 08-13-2012 10:58 AM

Not being completely agnostic but with the IMS Guardian installed I will have time to say my Hail Marys before I call the flatbed truck.

Johnny Danger 08-13-2012 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce Wayne (Post 301463)
it seems we're still in stone age times here in the UK..

IMS prevention is taken care of by appeasing the ancient gods by deflowering a virgin on the altar stone at stonehenge..

as san rensho says it's a small price to pay for our motors.

That's all I needed to know ! I'm switching over my steering wheel and moving to the UK !

Johnny Danger 08-14-2012 05:45 PM

1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnny Danger (Post 301373)
For those who can't afford an IMS replacement, or even the Guardian for that matter, behold it's the IMS Indulgence! For just $14.29 ($17.49 if you're a Pentecostal or Adventist), the good folks at this roadside chapel will rebuke the IMS Demon with all manner of prayer in the most apostolic of fashion . Get that IMS Devil behind you !




* The fee also requires a small act of contrition. Unsure of what that involves at this time.

I stop in this evening and experienced a real Holy IMS Explosion ! I never thought that there would be this many people with M96 engine demons !


Old Time Fashion Preaching Pt.1 - YouTube

Allen K. Littlefield 08-17-2012 05:05 AM

Isn't that St. Charles IMS church and discount house of oil? Presided over by the right Reb-rend, "Jake"?

With apologies to Don Imus.


AKL:rolleyes:


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