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wife, girl friend, or since you were in Nevada...

Anyhow just sayin... :D

Smokin' a bowl always worked for me :cool:.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe B (Post 398213)

Smokin' a bowl always worked for me :cool:.

All that does is make the long trip feel looooooooonger.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BruceH (Post 397910)

Dealing with entitlement starts at a much younger age and mom has to be on board. My ex had an extreme sense of entitlement that came out later in our marriage. The kids were becoming like her as well. Rules didn't mean anything when mom doesn't enforce while dad is gone at work. I ended up divorcing her for this and several other reasons but mainly I was afraid of how my kids would turn out. I was not popular but when it came to the kids, I made sure they understood that they were not entitled to anything other than food and shelter. Mom always told them dad would pay for everything. Wrong. They all had around $4000 in an account from their grandparents which was opened when each was born. They wanted to use it to buy a car. Fine, but you MUST have a job to pay for gas, insurance, repairs. I got all kinds of grief over that. It would take hours to relate all of the stories and drama but long story short, I now have three very responsible young adult children, a third grade teacher, a social worker for Child Protective Services, and a Marine.

My oldest, the teacher, who was once by far the most entitled, said to me in college(which she was paying for through, grants, scholarships and work)(I was still paying child support on her, another long story, can't pay for both), "You know dad, I'm becoming a lot like you." She called me two days ago to tell me how good it felt to have an excellent credit score/report. Her mother has declared bankruptcy and 11 years after divorcing her, I still get calls about every other month from creditors trying to find her. Not my problem anymore:D I had dinner last night with my two girls and their husbands, both fine, responsible men. Oh, and their weddings had a budget, and anything above that amount was on them. You would be amazed at how nice of a wedding you can have when you combine a budget with hard work and creativity!

To cure a sense of entitlement means that you are going to have to make some very unpopular decisions, and then stick to them no matter how much others pressure you. You will have to battle yourself to not give in. Giving in is easy, sticking it out is very difficult. But the rewards are worth it! Good luck:cheers:

Very nice. Thank you for that.

I had German parents!!!

Actually, technically my dad was even a Hitler youth although American history paints a dramatic tabloid style picture of what that was about, the reality of it for most was very tame. Kinda like the Boy Scouts really except funded by the National Socialist Party (Nationalsozialismus= Nazi) with the objective of creating capable potential future combatants.

Anyone that knows what being raised by German parents is like understands what I'm talking about.

Its the dictatorship/disciplined style of child rearing, none of that wishy washy crap that goes on now. You had no choices/privaledges what so ever until you proved yourself responsible and capable.

It may have seemed harsh but it worked. I became smart, responsible and diligent. I paid my own way through University,
bought my own cars (crappy is all I could afford so I had to become the mechanic too), bought my own homes, paid for my own weddings and more.
Results in living well, prospering, and succeeded in life. Know no limitations and have made all dreams reality.

No run ins with the law ever, except 2 speeding tickets in 30+ years. The Boxster has radar fortunately. :p

Tough love and consistency is what gets kids where they need to be in the long run. Parents let them decide too much for themselves too early and don't give them the tools and discipline to succeed.

To get to the point. On your long drive home, plan out your kids options at this point and make him commit to a plan by 50 miles from your home. If he has not committed to a plan by the 50 mile limit, let him out the door and tell him he needs more time to become more decisive and thus should walk the rest of the way to do his thinking and build some character.

It won't kill him but will show you mean business and give him time to think and become an achiever. If you don't follow through you might as well get used to your kid living with you the rest of your life and on welfare.

Tough Love time!!!

My 1st babysitter was a former Hitler Youth instructer. My Dad was in the AirForce stationed in West Germany when I was born at Ramstein AFB. We lived off base in a duplex owned by my Babysiter/trainer. When I was 2 months old she would take me outside in the middle of winter daily to condition me to the cold. :eek:

As for long drives in the middle of nowhere, that's where I do my best brainstorming.

I sing. And sing loud. With the radio, without the radio, sometimes I sing a different song than what is playing on the radio.

Thank god I'm by myself.