I'm in HOT water
 

So I'm sitting at a bar, drinking a catptain and coke, posting this waiting for my 99 boxster to cool off... (After $8 k into a seized engine, this time I'm not taking any chances.)

I don't know what it's called, a temperature LED, light? Whatever it's called, the thing is flashing red even though it's halfway between 180 and the next little mark... Anyhow, I popped the trunk and twisted the cap off the water reserveroir and it was BUBBLING HOT! I looked in there and it was kinda greenish... The bumper is also really hot. Should I be worried???

I had similar symptoms with a bad thermostat. Where in Louisiana are you?

I would guess thermostat also. If you're seeing coolant in the reservoir, you're likely not too low - but it could be coolant level. That's what the blinking light indicates. I would have more coke than Captain if you're not wanting more hot water. ;)

The flashing light means either low coolant or a malfunction of the intake fan. A solid light indicates an overheat condition.

A show of hands - how many of you have actually read your owner's manual?

Have you lost coolant? If you have and don't know how to refill it and bleed the system, have it flatbedded. don't risk overheating. even a brief overheating can be fatal to your motor.

Yup, manual answers this one.

Sounds like you're low on coolant. Temp fix is distilled water to top up until you can get the correct coolant in there.

Whats the betting we won't hear from the OP re this problem again........

dollars to donuts....we won't get closure on this one...

So... It's a coolant leak.
it goes strait to the ground about 2-feet in front of where you pour the water.
I lifted up the carpet in the trunk to see if it was wet and it was not.

Worst case scenario? Cost wise?

Never open the cap on a cooling system while the car is hot. Cars 101.

Wait hold up.. just re-read your post..

"it goes straight to the ground"

Does that mean AS YOU POUR, it's going straight to the ground from underneath the car?? or after you run it for a while, it OVERFLOWS and shows up on the ground?

With the car cold, fill the tank to the "Max" line marking. Underneath the plastic "cover" under the two caps, lift the valve clip and go drive it for a bit (put the caps on). That should remove any air from the system.

Tank replacement is 800-900a dollars
That would be worst- case scenario.

And the coolant that should be used in these engines isn't green.. You are asking for corrosion issues.

T-stat or cooling fans. Could also be crap from the previous motor clogging the cooling lines, radiators, oil cooler - suspect engine installer flushed the lines thoroughly, but who knows.

From the sound of it, I'd suspect the fans. The coolant on the ground correlates to the overflow tube - designed to vent fluid if it overheats - which it would do with a fan failure.

Run AC and get out and check each side of the front bumper listening for the fans (2) running - with AC they should both be on. If not, suspect relays (there is a Hi and Lo) or the series resistor(s). Neither is a big fix.

Cheers!